Very excited and proud to add this to my blog. Introducing for the first time, a guest posting by my sibling Oifvekenheimer MacDougal!
Now that July 4th is over, hoo-ha salute salute salute, its time for the Jews of the world to get ready for the Beis Hamikdosh commemoration period.
From fast day Shiva Asar B'Tamuz to fast day Tisha B'Av Jews are ”supposed to” be working on their sinas chinam. Ohr Saadya is hard at work on their sinas chinam.
Some of their enhanced festivities:
They are fasting Saturday and Sunday, because their holy Rav Poskines that Saturday is the real Shiva Asar B'Tamuz and since they're in Gollus they must keep two days. Having two days of fasting keeps them out of the nursing home and into Feldman's home, neighbors and Teaneck be damned.
Engraved invitations went out last week by snail mail and evite for Shiva Asar B'Tamuz & Tisha B'Av. Don't bother showing up without one or you'll be ”Bar Kamtza'd” right out of the self proclaimed ”thriving, young, dynamic community with a focus on communal warmth, serious davening, and high-level Torah learning.” Sounds like the same propaganda they've been spewing since they were at the Center minus the warmth, just ask their current neighbors.
Dynamic community meaning according to dictionary.com,vigorously active or forceful; as in the dynamic president of the Shul, Robert ”Docile” Erlich. During the three Weeks, Ohr Saadya will forcibly put all of Teaneck in a state of duress in court so Robert can push his will onto the people, under the spiritual guidance of The Parsonage part of 554 Queen Anne Rd.
There will be a special L'Chayim kiddish to Celebrate the successful Sinas Chinam campaign on Shabbos Nachamu. Don't plan on having lunch at home. The Rav will be serving everyone from the Rebitzen's plate. There will be kibbe, lachmajin, cigars and Zalman will make everyone sing an old sephardic niggun (tune) while eating. Volunteers are needed for the Heimlich brigade because got in himmel (g-d in heaven) you don't sing while chewing.
In keeping with the traditions that caused the destruction of the first temple married men will be on hand to do CPR on all the women of the Shtibshul regardless of need and in keeping with the traditions caused the destruction of the second temple, everyone will talk and gossip about it.
Volunteers are needed to saw off all the chair legs before Tisha B'Av so no one will sin by sitting on a tall chair. Of course there will be two 1/2 days of fasting because that's when the fires stopped burning.
No worries. Just because the three weeks are over doesn't mean the sinas chinam ends. After all, Ohr Saadya is all about words and not actions. Check out their website and newspaper quotes through the years. Its all preach and no practice.
Good Shabbos.
Now that July 4th is over, hoo-ha salute salute salute, its time for the Jews of the world to get ready for the Beis Hamikdosh commemoration period.
From fast day Shiva Asar B'Tamuz to fast day Tisha B'Av Jews are ”supposed to” be working on their sinas chinam. Ohr Saadya is hard at work on their sinas chinam.
Some of their enhanced festivities:
They are fasting Saturday and Sunday, because their holy Rav Poskines that Saturday is the real Shiva Asar B'Tamuz and since they're in Gollus they must keep two days. Having two days of fasting keeps them out of the nursing home and into Feldman's home, neighbors and Teaneck be damned.
Engraved invitations went out last week by snail mail and evite for Shiva Asar B'Tamuz & Tisha B'Av. Don't bother showing up without one or you'll be ”Bar Kamtza'd” right out of the self proclaimed ”thriving, young, dynamic community with a focus on communal warmth, serious davening, and high-level Torah learning.” Sounds like the same propaganda they've been spewing since they were at the Center minus the warmth, just ask their current neighbors.
Dynamic community meaning according to dictionary.com,vigorously active or forceful; as in the dynamic president of the Shul, Robert ”Docile” Erlich. During the three Weeks, Ohr Saadya will forcibly put all of Teaneck in a state of duress in court so Robert can push his will onto the people, under the spiritual guidance of The Parsonage part of 554 Queen Anne Rd.
There will be a special L'Chayim kiddish to Celebrate the successful Sinas Chinam campaign on Shabbos Nachamu. Don't plan on having lunch at home. The Rav will be serving everyone from the Rebitzen's plate. There will be kibbe, lachmajin, cigars and Zalman will make everyone sing an old sephardic niggun (tune) while eating. Volunteers are needed for the Heimlich brigade because got in himmel (g-d in heaven) you don't sing while chewing.
In keeping with the traditions that caused the destruction of the first temple married men will be on hand to do CPR on all the women of the Shtibshul regardless of need and in keeping with the traditions caused the destruction of the second temple, everyone will talk and gossip about it.
Volunteers are needed to saw off all the chair legs before Tisha B'Av so no one will sin by sitting on a tall chair. Of course there will be two 1/2 days of fasting because that's when the fires stopped burning.
No worries. Just because the three weeks are over doesn't mean the sinas chinam ends. After all, Ohr Saadya is all about words and not actions. Check out their website and newspaper quotes through the years. Its all preach and no practice.
Good Shabbos.
